I have had several dreams since my son died. All had specific meaning. Last night I dreamt we were all out as a family. I went around to kiss everyone hello and came to Billy. He was wearing his black dress shirt that he owned and jeans. I was so shocked to see him. We kept hugging and hugging. He said mom I am back. I kept saying omg i have been so sad. I missed you so much. I was so relieved this nightmare was over. I woke up and I felt so sick to my stomach because it all wasnt real. I felt so incredibly sad. As much as I love to see him in my dreams it always ends up that I say goodbye again to my son. It’s always like trying to find your way out of a nightmare that never ends.

3 thoughts on “Dreams

  1. I think about how much I would love to see Wil one more time for one more hug and “I love you, Mom.” Then I realize I’d just have to give him up all over again. It is so unbelievably hard. We’ll never stop wishing for this nightmare to end.
    Love and hugs from Ginger

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