I went to see the Dave Matthew’s band with my son for 16 years. It became our thing. I was so happy to have this special bond with him. He loved the song Grey street. I never paid much attention to why. The other morning I was listening to the dmb radio station on my way to work. They started playing Grey street and now when I hear it I think of Billy saying hello mom. But before the song Dave Matthew’s started talking why he wrote the song. He said there are so many colors in life and sometimes we cant get past the front door. We are stuck in the grayness of lifes troubles. Sadness of life overrules those bright colors.
Oh, look at how she listens
She says nothing of what she thinks
She just goes stumbling through her memories
Staring out onto Grey Street
She thinks, “Hey, how did I come to this?
I dream myself a thousand times around the world
But I can’t get out of this place”
There’s an emptiness inside her
And she’d do anything to fill it in
But all the colors mix together – to grey
And it breaks her heart
How she wishes it was different
She prays to God most every night
And though she swears it doesn’t listen
There’s still a hope in her it might
She says, “I pray
But they fall on deaf ears
Am I supposed to take it on myself?
To get out of this place?”
There’s loneliness inside her
And she’d do anything to fill it in
And though it’s red blood bleeding from her now
It feels like cold blue ice in her heart
When all the colors mix together – to grey
And it breaks her heart
Tonight my granddaughter is coming. So much pain these past three years. My heart is so full of hope at this beautiful gift being added to our family. But that hole always surfaces. I know his light is shining right next to his brother. I can’t help but think she was put here for a reason. But the other half of my heart will always be sad. We should be together. All of us. He will always be missing. Life will keep moving forward and we will always have to trust the light that is not seen.
I saw this post and it instantly connected to me. I shall never return to what once was. I remember at the funeral the priest sat with me as if he were giving me last rights. He sat with me for a long time. I cant even remember the things he said to me. But I remember the feeling as if I had died too. I did but I didnt know it yet. You will never return to your life. This is grief of losing a child.
I dont know what provokes it. I think I have it managed most days. It hits me. I never know where I will be. I could be sitting at my desk at work or in a store. Your life comes through me and grabs my breathe. I feel this hardness in my chest and the tears start to fall. My heart starts beating so fast and all of our days start jumping in front of me. I often think you are visiting me in these moments. Reminding me you are still here. It’s on these days I am reminded that my life will never be the same. No matter how hard i manage to breathe every day
Written by Cynthia Evans
Photo by my sonRevealing the harsh truths about An over-thinker with a sensitive heart.
If you are an over-thinker, you probably take people’s opinions too seriously and try to understand exactly why they say whatever they say.
If you also have a sensitive heart, then all this overthinking probably drives you crazy, because you try to analyze everything without sounding insane to others.Another harsh truth about sensitive over-thinkers is that they see the world in black and white. They can’t be in the middle and settle for gray. They don’t have ‘half-feelings,’ they either do or don’t, love or hate, feel completely happy or completely devastated.Sometimes, you might be ‘too much’ for some people; too sentimental, too analyzing, too emotional, too nervous, too romantic.
And that will make you sad, but you’ve got to realize that not everyone is going to like us. Because if you don’t, then you’ll always feel like you don’t belong
Another common thing insensitive over-thinkers is that they have an inner struggle to be present in life, but they usually don’t really feel connected to their environment or the people around them.
That’s why they thrive when they work alone or when they are isolated from their routine.They crave love most of the time, but they don’t like to put themselves out there much. Their heart is fragile and hopeful, so when they don’t get the affection or the love they were looking for, it breaks them.
Then they shut themselves off from the world because they need time to heal, even if it wasn’t anything major.They’re always trying to find the meaning behind everything; behind their pain or their heartbreak; behind their losses and the lessons they’ve learned. They can’t just live without trying to find answers to the questions they have.
They have a special relationship with the universe. Sometimes they feel deeply connected like their bond is so strong and powerful, but sometimes they feel so distant like they don’t understand the world anymore. It often feels like it’s them against the universe and that’s a battle they can’t figure out how to win.When you’re an over-thinker with a sensitive heart, it’s possible to suffer from insomnia, as your bed is the place where your worst thoughts and fears haunt you all at once. It’s where you question everything you say and everything you do.However, sensitive over-thinkers are characterized by some of the best traits in the world. They are artistic, creative and unique.
It’s been 3 years since I’ve seen my son. I only remember him from the last time I saw him. I often wonder what he looks like now. Do we stay the same in heaven. I got this email today. The day before my sons birthday. A medium wrote it in his newsletter I subscribe to. It was so beautiful. I hope Billy decided to be a teenager and he is playing handball today. I can see that smile. “That’s the punch”
Written by Matt Fraser, medium
A friend of mine was celebrating a birthday the other day and asked me, “Do we keep getting older in Heaven?” I had to laugh. The answer is No. There is no one is spirit that looks to be 167 years old, thank God! Can you imagine? Actually, there would be souls who were thousands of years old. What would that even look like? But still, it’s a question that many people ask me.
The Meaning Of Time.
We celebrate birthdays to mark the passage of time. Time has an important meaning to us, so we mark years, anniversaries, birthdays – all the milestones that matter here on Earth. It doesn’t really work the same way in Heaven. Spirit is infinite and forever, not limited by time – so a year is like a drop of water in an infinite sea. So with that in mind, it makes sense that birthdays and things like that don’t have the same type of importance they do in the physical world. They are important as moments when we feel especially connected to those we love, but not because they mark a specific amount of time.In Heaven, we are all pure energy that reflects our deepest, truest being. People take spirit forms that are a reflection of their best selves. That spirit form might reflect any age. What’s most important is that is a manifestation of the soul.Your loved ones in Heaven appear as an image of themselves that best reflects them when they were free of illness when they were healthy and living their best life. For example, a person who was on life support for 12 years may choose to be 12 years younger in Heaven. Sometimes souls who have passed from Alzheimer’s or suffered for many years with an illness will choose to reflect who they were before they had the disease.
Heaven is a reunion.
I am writing this blog because when you think about reuniting with loved ones in Heaven I want you to focus on what is important. The fact that you might pass 20 years after your husband won’t make a bit of difference when the time comes. If you are soul-mates, you will be a perfect match on the other side. Your loved ones in Heaven do not want you to worry about what they will look like or the age gap between you. They just want you to know that they are in Heaven watching over you and supporting you. Their life journey is complete, but once you reunite, you will catch up and resume connection in the afterlife with those you love.
By Yasmin Mogahed
You can continue to blame the people and the situations that have hurt you. Or you can take back your power and look through the actors. To see the Director.
Every single aspect of your life has a purpose and is by divine design. Even the parts you hate. Even the parts you try to hide from the world and yourself. Even the parts that hurt. Even the tears. The betrayal. The divorce. The loss.
You will find the purpose when you grow through this. When you allow nothing to shrink you. Or chain you. Or own you. When you stop hearing the noise of what other people are saying or thinking of you. When you stop the “what if’s”. When you stop beating yourself to a mental pulp. And never again allow someone to mistreat, disrespect, use, or take you for granted.
But most of all, you will only find peace when you finally remove the thing that has occupied God’s place in your heart.
Read that again.
Only then will you be able to truly love again. In a healthy way.