When my brother died 14 years ago I transferred that loss into taking care of my parents. They died 5 months apart from each other 8 years later. My mom died of a broken heart. I watched her suffer from the loss of my brother. She didnt leave the house anymore only to go to the cemetery or to church. I never understood why she put his shoes on his bed with his hat and kept his room like a memorial until I lost my own son. Grief makes people uncomfortable. Those that dont understand it. I wish I could sit with her now and talk about her pain. I mourned my brother the day she died. I suppressed it all that time. We all grieve in our own way. You read in books there is no right or wrong way. Give in to all of it. You would love them if they were here and never stop and it is the same for grief.