The chapters of you

Grief is not just one sudden moment that changes your life forever. It’s all the moments that lead you to today. It’s the first time you walked. Your first tooth. The day you took off on your bicycle without the training wheels. Your first day of kindergarten when I walked away and I cried. Your first stripe on your green belt in karate. The day i read in your class at school. The day you jumped off the diving board at swimming lessons. Sitting with you in the doctors when you got mono. Taking you for your tux for your prom. Dropping you off at your first job. Taking you to sign up for your courses at college. Taking you for your road test. Sitting with you when a girl broke your heart. Dancing with you at your wedding. Sitting with you waiting for your child to be born. Telling you I love you every morning on the train. So many moments that are rolled up in this life that I lost as if I have lost my own. It’s not the day we grieve or how they left. It is all of these days that gather themselves and are forever present with each passing day. We have lost a lifetime of what once was and what could have been